The Ghost Zone Gazette
by turbomagnus
Summary: A collection of my Danny Phantom shorts, drabbles and snippets. Characters, situations and pairings may vary, but Danny/Ember will likely feature prominently.
1. Payoff

Author's Note: The 365 Project is an experimental project to write and post at least one short every day for the next year, not including my semi-regular bi-weekly updates. Whether or not that goal can be reached, we'll see... This is The 365 Project, 7 February.

Would have had this up earlier, but had to play driver for two doctors appointments, some other errands, then got home to Fanfiction pitching a temper and being down... yeah, great for those of us on deadlines, guys...

Disclaimer: "Danny Phantom" and all associated characters and situations are created by Butch Hartman and used for entertainment purposes without permission or intent to profit.

* * *

><p>-o0O0o-<p>

"Payoff"  
>By; J.T. Magnus, 'Turbo'<p>

-o0O0o-

* * *

><p>It was just another day in the Ghost Zone, except for one small part, one small realm just on the edge of the Far Frozen that most didn't even know existed, a realm that almost seemed at though it wasn't fully there. In that realm that seemed to only half exist, two figures met.<p>

"You got what I need, buddy?" The larger asked the smaller, but easily more dangerous, all the while keeping his eyes open for betrayal or outsiders.

"You got what _I _need, buddy?" The smaller figure countered sharply.

The larger answered by pulling out a piece of paper and holding it up where the smaller could see it, "List of planned outtings for the next month, matched to your schedule."

Nodding at the sight of it, the smballer figure sat a box between them and opened it so the larger could look, "One hundred percent pure, straight from the source."

The larger figure reached into the box and pulled out a small sample, examining it, "Doubled, nice."

The smaller figure smirked, "I give the best, now for me?"

Handing over the sheet of paper, the larger figure ran his now-free hand over the contents of the box, "Oh, yes, I can do nice things with this... Pleasure doing business with you."

"Pleasure's mine," the smaller figure countered as the larger used their ghost powers to lift the box into the air and float it along with them as they left, "Now I'm the one who needs to get out of here. Thank God for shortcuts."

Slipping a little further into the realm, the smaller figure came upon a narrow gap between two rocks. Squeezing himself between the rocks and wiggling through the gap, a geographic impossibility happened as they exited the gap and found themselves at the Fenton Ghost Portal and a quick exit from the Ghost Zone.

When they emerged into the human world, Jazz Fenton was standing there before them in that pose known to all people who come home late from somewhere they weren't supposed to be only to find themselves met at the door by a responsible authority figure; arms folded across the chest, hip cocked to one side, head tilted downward and eyes narrowed above a scowl. Then she said it...

"Where were you, Danny?"

Danny Fenton, the halfa also known as Danny Phantom rubbed the back of his head nervously, "Uh, I had to deal with The Box Ghost?"


	2. Achy Breaky Breakdown

Author's Note: The 365 Project is an experimental project to write and post at least one short every day for the next year, not including my semi-regular bi-weekly updates. Whether or not that goal can be reached, we'll see... This is The 365 Project, 19 February.

The local radio station DJ's constant playing of the same song has finally gotten on Ember's last nerve. DxE.

Disclaimer: "Danny Phantom" and all associated characters and situations are created by Butch Hartman and used for entertainment purposes without permission or intent to profit. "Achy Breaky Song" by Weird Al is owned by him and his recording label and is also used without permission or intent to profit.

* * *

><p>-o0O0o-<p>

"Achy Breaky Breakdown"  
>By J.T. Magnus, 'Turbo'<p>

-o0O0o-

* * *

><p>Ember McLain, ghost rock star, was marching down the street with her guitar in her hand and destruction on her mind when a figure descended from the sky and stood in front of her to block her way.<p>

"Out of the way, Baby-pop," Ember snarled in warning, "This has nothing to do with you."

"The second you started causing trouble in the human world, it had everything to do with me, Ember," Danny Phantom, resident unappreciated half-ghost hero of Amity Park, countered.

"Don't be a hero, Danny," Ember shook her head, refusing to back down, "You know as well as I do this isn't 'causing trouble'; this is justice. I'll do a lot for you, Baby-pop, ever since we've been together I've put up with being tortured by your mom's love for Donnie and Marie and your dad's taste for Barry Manilow..."

Involuntarily, both ghostly teens cringed at the thought.

"I've even kept from saying anything when Jazz started listening to New Kids on the Block after their comeback," Ember continued, "But I can't take any more of this; this has got to end, Baby-pop."

"Maybe so," Danny shook his head, "But this isn't the way, Ember."

"I begged, Baby-pop," Ember shot back, "I begged that friggin' DJ to play something else, it didn't even have to be one of my songs, I could have listened to Vanilla Ice or even Tiffany - but no, they won't stop. Every day, time and time again, hour after hour... I'm starting to hear that stupid song in my sleep, Baby-pop, do you know what that's like to a musician? To have someone else's song stuck in your head and it's not even a good song?"

"You think I like hearing it any better?" Danny snapped, "Every time I hear that nauseating song, it makes me want to lose my lunch, but you can't just decide it's 'time for that station to go off the air' just because of this, dipstick."

Ember narrowed her eyes at her boyfriend, "Did you just call me 'dipstick', dipstick?"

"Yeah! And you know why?" Danny asked, then answered his own question, "Because going off half-cocked like this because you're mad is the kind of stupidity _I'd_ pull!"

Rolling her eyes, Ember asked, "Then what do you think I'd do instead?"

Danny grinned, "You're going to love this."

* * *

><p>-o0o-<p>

Side by side, Danny and Ember walked through the front door's of Amity Park's local radio station and looked around the lobby.

"We're looking for the broadcast studio," Ember announced

From behind his desk, the security guard raised an eyebrow, "Purpose of visit?"

"Voicing a complaint about the DJ's tastes in music," Danny answered, causing the guard to grin.

"Down the hall, third door on your right - you can't miss it," The guard informed them, pointing over his shoulder with his thumb."

"Thank you," Ember answered as she unslung her guitar from her back to have it ready.

As the ghostly duo walked down the hall, the guard picked up the phone and pressed one of the extension buttons, "Get everyone to the broadcast room. Look, don't ask questions, just do it..."

* * *

><p>-o0o-<p>

When the door to the broadcast room opened despite the 'On The Air' sign being lit, it caused the DJ to look up from his work.

"I'm sorry, listeners, we seem to have some unexpected guests in the studio... Something I can do for you, Inviso-Bill?" The DJ asked, causing Danny to snarl, he really hated that name people had stuck him with.

"Actually, yeah," Danny answered, "My friend and I are here as representatives of GABR."

The DJ frowned, "Gabber?"

Ember smirked and leveled her guitar in a 'shoot-from-the-hip' position, "Ghosts Against Billy Ray... Pull!"

The station's disk for that 'Achy Breaky' song glowed blow with ecto-energy and flew into Danny's hand before he tossed it like a frisbee... or a clay pigeon. A quick chord on her guitar and Ember had blown it to pieces with a smile.

"Thanks for the help," Ember remarked casually, "We're trying to stop noise pollution."

Speaking loud enough for the microphone to pick up, Danny added, "Noise pollution is everyone's problem, we've all got ears... so next time, when people ask you to stop playing a song, try it."

"Oh," Ember added further, "And, have a _nice day_."

Chuckling to themselves, Danny opened the door so that Ember could leave the broadcast room and as he followed her, they found themselves surrounded by station employees. A little nervous, Danny glanced around before commenting...

"Uh... hi?"

The security guard who had directed them to the broadcast room was the first to start clapping, but soon the entire room was filled with the sound of applause.


	3. The Maltese Phantom

Author's Note: The 365 Project is an experimental project to write and post at least one short every day for the next year, not including my semi-regular bi-weekly updates. Whether or not that goal can be reached, we'll see... This is The 365 Project, 21 February.

Disclaimer: "Danny Phantom" and all associated characters and situations are created by Butch Hartman and used for entertainment purposes without permission or intent to profit.

* * *

><p>-o0O0o-<p>

"The Maltese Phantom"  
>By J.T. Magnus, 'Turbo'<p>

-o0O0o-

* * *

><p>Private Investigator Dan Fenton stood there, half-in and half-out of the shadows, watching as the female uniform put the cuffs on the woman while Lieutenant Walker informed her of her rights.<p>

"-will be appointed for you by the court at no cost. Do you understand these rights as I have just read them to you?"

The new 'bracelets' she wore didn't go well with her opera gloves or the halter-top dress, but that didn't matter to 'Ember' McLain as the singer snarled at Fenton, "You dipstick, how could you do this to me?"

Fenton stepped out of the shadows and fully into the light, "Sorry, sweetheart, but I'm just not as crooked as I'm supposed to be, I guess."

"You dipstick," Ember repeated harshly

"I asked if you understood your rights as I have read them to you," Walker repeated forcefully.

"Yeah, I understand," Ember told the cop before looking back to Fenton, "I thought there was something special between us, but I guess not. I guess I'm just another one of those women you meet in your line of work to you, detective."

"There is something there," Fenton answered as he crammed his hands into the pockets of his trenchcoat, "That's why I'll be waiting when you get out. Try not to get the chair, sweetheart."

With that, Fenton turned and started to walk away, ignoring the sounds from behind him as Walker and the female uniform began to lead Ember away.

* * *

><p>-o0o-<p>

Sitting up on the living room couch while the light from the television illuminated the room, Danny blinked, trying to ignore the pain he was feeling in his head as he regained his orientation and the events of the last few hours recalled themselves in his mind, "Okay, new rule; no old detective movies on nights after fighting any of the girls... It gives me strange dreams..."


	4. Super Trouper

Author's Note: The 365 Project is an experimental _multi-fandom_ project to write and post at least one short every day for the next year, not including my semi-regular bi-weekly updates. For more details, see the relevent section in my profile. This is The 365 Project, 27 March.

Disclaimer: Disclaimer: "Danny Phantom" and all associated characters and situations are created by Butch Hartman and used for entertainment purposes without permission or intent to profit. The song "Super Trouper" was performed by ABBA. Yeah, if you can't tell by now, I've got eclectic tastes in music.

* * *

><p>-o0O0o-<p>

"Super Trouper"  
>By J.T. Magnus, 'Turbo'<p>

-o0O0o-

* * *

><p>Atlantic City, New Jersey,<br>United States of America  
>March 27, 2014<p>

The rock star shook her head and groaned as she finished dressing for her show that would start in a couple hours, after her road crew had finished the last sound-checks and special effects set-ups, "Facing twenty thousand of your fans, how can anyone be so lonely? It's part of a success that never ends, still I'm thinking about you only...There are moments when I think I'm going crazy, but it's gonna be alright. Everything will be so different when I'm on the stage tonight..."

"'Super trouper beams are gonna blind me... But I won't feel blue like I always do," she finished pulling on the single opera glove she wore and reached out and brushed her lover's picture with her gloved fingertips, "Because somewhere in the crowd there's you."

"I was sick and tired of everything when I called you last night from Glasgow," she said with a sigh, referring to her concert the night before in Pennsylvania, "You've made me hate being on tour; all I do is eat and sleep and sing, wishing every show was the last show."

She chuckled, "So imagine when I hear you're coming to the show tonight since it finally _is _the last show of the tour. Suddenly, I feel alright and everything will be so different when I'm on the stage tonight. Tonight the lights are gonna find me shining like the sun, smiling, having fun, feeling like I'm number one."

Even though it was just a picture and wasn't really him, talking to it was helping, so she continued, "Your tickets and backstage pass will be waiting, just like I'll be waiting backstage after the show. I'll be there when you arrive and the sight of you will prove to me I'm still alive... and when you take me in your arms and hold me tight, I know it's gonna mean so much tonight."

There was a knocking on the door before a voice called, "Ember, you've got final sound check in five; doors open in half an hour, so we need to do this quick."

Ember pulled her fingers away from her lover's picture with a snarl and shouted back, "Fine, I'm on my way!"

Looking at the picture one last time, Ember whispered, "See you tonight, Baby-pop."


	5. The Levee

Author's Note: The 365 Project is an experimental _multi-fandom_ project to write and post at least one short every day for the next year, not including my semi-regular bi-weekly updates. For more details, see the relevent section in my profile. This is The 365 Project, 12 April.

Disclaimer: "Danny Phantom" and all associated characters and situations are created by Butch Hartman and used for entertainment purposes without permission or intent to profit. Partially inspired by songs like Don McLean's 'The Day The Music Died'.

* * *

><p>-o0O0o-<p>

"The Levee"  
>By J.T. Magnus, 'Turbo'<p>

-o0O0o-

* * *

><p>Outside the city limits of Amity Park, beyond the eyes of adults and parents - and snooping government agencies like the Guys In White - there was a place where the young and the ageless gathered on Friday nights. This place was a levee just outside of town that few people went to except for teenagers and young adults on weekend nights and the occasional person fishing in the early morning light. This particular Friday night, two vehicles were parked on the top of the levee; the smaller a motorcycle resting on its kickstand well away from the waterside, the other a blue pick-up truck parked at an angle so that part of its tailgate hung out over the water.<p>

"Now it's your turn to walk the plank, Pirate-boy," a dark haired girl in her early teens informed a green-haired boy with a grin, forcing him at stick-point back to the edge of the tailgate where it hung over the water while a green-colored puppy played at her feet, chasing a skeletal parrot back and forth.

"I'm the captain," the boy insisted in frustration, "I'm the one who says who does and doesn't walk the plank!"

"Oh, really?" the girl smirked, "Cujo..."

The puppy looked up at the girl as she pointed at the boy and suddenly the puppy turned into a giant dog with a tail of green fire and gave a sharp bark that startled the boy, causing him to tumble backwards off the tailgate and into the water.

"Good boy, Cujo!" The girl reached up and patted the dog's neck seconds before it turned back into its puppy form.

"No fair!" The boy cried, spitting out the water that had gotten into his mouth, "You cheated!"

"How could I cheat?" the girl countered, hands on her hips as she stood on the tailgate, "There's no rules, remember?"

As if to punctuate her statement, the girl cannonballed off the tailgate and into the water, the wave it caused washing over the boy and leaving him spitting out water again. Seeing the girl do it, the puppy ran back to the cab of the truck and then took off running at full speed down the truck-bed and lept off the tailgate...

"Cujo, no!" The girl shouted, but it was too late...

In mid-air, puppy became giant dog again and hit the water with enough force that it knocked both kids into the bank and caused water to wash up onto the ground. Cujo bobbed back to the surface in his puppy form and dog-paddled over to where the girl was to give her a big wet puppy-dog lick of a kiss.

"Ew, Cujo, don't do that," she grimaced as she splashed some water on her face to wipe the slobber off, "Lick Youngblood instead!"

When Cujo turned his head towards the boy, Youngblood began to backstroke further out into the water, "No, no, no, no, no licking! No licking!"

Since Youngblood was 'friend', but not 'master' or 'girl-master', Cujo ignored the order and instead started dogpaddling after the boy. Watching from the shore, an older teen shook his head before turning his attention back to more important things; like the hot dogs he was grilling over the campfire the group had going. Despite knowing he was there and everything, Tucker Foley couldn't actually see Youngblood, just a faint haze where the ghost boy was supposed to be, which was still better than when he couldn't see the 'Master of Make-Believe' at all. Looking around, Tucker only noticed half of the other 'young adults' were actually visible and smirked to himself at just what he was seeing; after all, it wasn't every night one saw rock diva Ember McLain sitting and strumming on her guitar with a supposed enemy's head laying in her lap as she did so.

"Hey, Danny," Tucker remarked casually, "I don't suppose either of you lovebirds have seen Kitty and Johnny recently, have you?"

Both Danny Fenton and Ember answered quickly and in unplanned unison, "We're not lovebirds!"

Tucker chuckled, "Danny, man, that didn't work with you and Sam, it's sure not gonna work when you've got your head in Ember's lap."

Trying to divert attention from that fact, Ember carefully sat aside her guitar and asked rather sharply, "Where is the goth, anyway?"

"Did you know it's easier that you'd think to get an auditorium at the local college for a debate on Ultra-Recyclo-Vegetarianism versus a meat-heavy diet?" Danny grinned up at the rock star ghost.

Ember honestly couldn't believe what she was hearing, "You didn't, dipstick..."

"Yep, Sam versus the Lunch Lady in front of a live audience," Danny chuckled, "Box Ghost is even taping it for me."

"And people say _I'm_ evil," Ember muttered.

"You're not evil," Danny smirked up at her, "Just... wild."

"Yeah, well, don't go getting any thoughts about trying to 'tame' me or anything, dipstick," Ember retorted.

Danny closed his eyes and remarked with a smile, "Fire melts ice to water and in doing so quenches itself."

Glaring down at him, Ember demanded, "What's that supposed to mean?"

Danny raised his voice, "It means that a certain pair of bikers need to remember that there's underage kids here."

"Oh, yeah," Johnny 13's voice drifted up from further down the levee, embarassment clear in his tone, "That."

"Sorry!" Kitty added with equal abashment.

"Just don't get the cops called out here again, okay?" Danny called back to them.

Since Danny still had his eyes closed, he never saw Ember gesture for Youngblood and Dani to get out of the water and come over to where they were, nor did he see the two younger teens take positions one at either leg, but he felt it when they grabbed his ankles and Ember reached under his arms and the three of them picked him up.

"Uh, guys? Guys, what are you doing? Okay, you three, this isn't funny!" Danny started to ramble as they started to get closer to the water.

"And a-heave," Youngblood called out as they started to swing Danny, "And a-ho! And a-heave, and a-ho, and away we go!"

And then Danny found himself sailing through the air towards the water and landing with a splash that soaked the three on shore and caused Tucker to frown.

"Hey, guys?" Tucker called out to them, "You mind watching it so you don't end up putting out the fire splashing around like that?"

"Sorry," four voices echoed, joined by the barks of one ghost dog.

"Yeah," Tucker muttered, "Don't be sorry, just don't do it, okay?"

Danny looked towards shore and his clone/sister/cousin and the two 'Phantoms' exchanged a look that said that after they had eaten, Tucker was going to be the one getting thrown in the river. Dogpaddling circles around Danny, Cujo wasn't sure what 'master' and 'girl-master' were so happy about, but he was sure that he liked being with them, 'friend meat-eater', 'friend with shadow', 'possessing friend', 'friend with pet bones' and 'master's almost-mate' like he was now. He just wished 'master' and 'master's almost-mate' would stop chasing their tails and be mates, he liked 'almost-mate' better than he did 'bossy female'. 'Almost-mate' reminded him of 'girl-master'. 'Bossy female' was still better than 'mean one' though. Cujo didn't like 'mean one' at all. But Cujo liked 'master'.

"Ew, Cujo," Danny grimaced when the puppy-form ghost dog suddenly paddled up to his face and started licking him, causing the others to start laughing.

"That's what I said," Dani remarked with a grin.


	6. Para-Abnormalities

Author's Note: The 365 Project is an experimental _multi-fandom_ project to write and post at least one short every day for the next year, not including my semi-regular bi-weekly updates. For more details, see the relevent section in my profile. This is The 365 Project, 21 April.

In the immortal words of Samuel L. Clemens...  
>"Persons attempting to find a motive in this narrative will be prosecuted; persons attempting to find a moral in it will be banished; persons attempting to find a plot in it will be shot.<br>BY ORDER OF THE AUTHOR."  
>I think I'm going to have to start adding that to my Standard Spiel; some people are taking this project and the resulting stories and shorts way more seriously than I am. That is not a good thing, people...<p>

Don't be mistaken, I actually enjoy watching shows about paranormal investigators and seeing all the different methods; I just thought that actual ghosts - or half-ghosts - would probably have a good laugh at some of them.

Disclaimer: "Danny Phantom" and all associated characters and situations are created by Butch Hartman and used for entertainment purposes without permission or intent to profit.

* * *

><p>-o0O0o-<p>

"Para-abnormalities"  
>By J.T. Magnus, 'Turbo'<p>

-o0O0o-

* * *

><p>"I can't get no protection from a garter snake!" The bearded man on the television complained to the men with him, "I need a copperhead, I need a cottonmouth!"<p>

The guy on the floor looked up at the girl on the couch, "Does that really work?"

She shook her head, "Come on, dipstick - frog's breath, snake venom, you're half-ghost, any of those things bother you?"

"Well, I don't really like snakes," the 'dipstick' admitted.

"As a ghost?"

"I never like snakes, but at least when I've gone ghost I can go intangible," he thought about it for a moment, "No, I guess none of that really works, huh?"

"Not for us, anyway," the girl answered, "Not even the bell."

* * *

><p>-o0o-<p>

The girl growled at the television, specifically at the video that the people on the show were watching, "Oh, I hate people like this..."

The guy frowned, "What, pranksters?"

"Fakers!" she corrected sharply, "Look, everything moving in the same direction and you can't see what's off camera over there. There's gotta be someone pulling fishing line or something to make everything move like that. That's why ghosts aren't respected like we should be, because whenever we really do something, everyone's all jaded towards it thanks to these jerks."

"So you like this show because...?"

"Think about it, Baby-pop," she sighed, "They're outting fakes and proving that ghosts can really exist at the same time. Sorry, but they're a whole lot easier to respect than people running around in orange or blue jumpsuits shooting at everything with ectoplasm."

"That's my parents you're talking about, Rock Star."

"Yeah, well, just proves miracles do happen that you didn't end up like them," She retorted.

"Okay," he conceded, "I'll give you that one."

* * *

><p>-o0o-<p>

"Okay, how do they make that decision?"

"About ghost versus cryptids?"

"Yeah, I mean - Wulf. He's a werewolf ghost, so which is the important part; werewolf or ghost? Or Frostbite; he'd be like a yeti... but he's a ghost. So what would this guy do; start investigating them when he thinks they're a werewolf or a yeti or whatever, then stop and pass it on to someone else when he discovers they're ghost?"

The girl sighed, "Baby-pop, you're thinking too much about this."

He chuckled, "Says the girl who all the conspiracy nuts claim her big concert was a cover for the Illuminati's mind control experiments. How long did you spend ranting about that?"

She folded her arms, "Bite me, dipstick."

"Sure thing," he grinned, "Just tell me where, when and how hard, hot-stuff."

* * *

><p>-o0O0o-<p>

Author's Note: I know I - and a lot of other people - have always written Ember as having dark hair as a human, but someone pointed out a semi-interesting fact that I thought I'd share. Danny and Dani have dark hair as humans, but it turns white as ghosts... so if Ember has blue hair as a ghost, it's possible that she could have had blonde - yellow being somewhat the 'negative' of blue - hair as a human, right?


	7. Day Off? Off Day

Author's Note: The 365 Project is an experimental _multi-fandom_ project to write and post at least one short every day for the next year, not including my semi-regular bi-weekly updates. For more details, see the relevent section in my profile. This is The 365 Project, 24 April.

In the immortal words of Samuel L. Clemens... "Persons attempting to find a motive in this narrative will be prosecuted; persons attempting to find a moral in it will be banished; persons attempting to find a plot in it will be shot. BY ORDER OF THE AUTHOR."

Disclaimer: "Danny Phantom" and all associated characters and situations are created by Butch Hartman and used for entertainment purposes without permission or intent to profit.

* * *

><p>-o0O0o-<p>

"Day Off? Off Day."  
>By J.T. Magnus, 'Turbo'<p>

-o0O0o-

* * *

><p>I was supposed to be enjoying a day off today. Contrary to the popular belief that heroes with super-powers are 'always on duty', we not only enjoy a good day off, we really need them. We need them because, among other reasons, getting shot at by the people you're trying to help isn't enjoyable. There's this Law made by a guy named Murphy, it says 'Friendly fire, isn't'. 'Family fire' isn't much better - that's when your own parents are the ones shooting at you, by the way.<p>

Day off, bus trip into New York City, nothing said to Sam or Tucker about where I'd be besides 'out of town', bribe the Box Ghost to do some spying and make sure none of the other ghosts were planning anything for today; I'd taken a lot of time to prepare for a little time to myself. Except for the most important part. How was I to know that New York was in the middle of its decannual... decadial... its upswing in ghosts and things that happens about every ten years? Yeah, that would've been helpful. Instead, I'm caught right in the middle of a full-scale paranormal invasion; not just ghosts, but demons, ecto-charged entities, you name it and it's somewhere in the city.

And if it happens to be some kind of reject from an old Bruce Lee or Jackie Chan movie? It's right here in front of me, making some kind of weird whooping noises and swinging its arms and legs around. Correction; after shaking my head at it and punching it in the face three times quick, causing it to collapse to the ground ready for Thermos - well, ready if I'd had a Thermos, anyway - it's now just on the ground in front of me. One down, a city to go. So it's just me and a few local people with unlicensed nuclear accelerators against an entire city full of bad. I'm gonna need a vacation to recover from this day off...


	8. Ildri

Author's Note: The 365 Project is an experimental _multi-fandom_ project to write and post at least one short every day for the next year, not including my semi-regular bi-weekly updates. For more details, see the relevent section in my profile. This is The 365 Project, 2 May.

In the immortal words of Samuel L. Clemens... "Persons attempting to find a motive in this narrative will be prosecuted; persons attempting to find a moral in it will be banished; persons attempting to find a plot in it will be shot. BY ORDER OF THE AUTHOR."

Sometimes, you've got gotta write some fluff. The title comes from a Scandinavian name meaning "Fire and Peace".

Disclaimer: "Danny Phantom" and all associated characters and situations are created by Butch Hartman and used for entertainment purposes without permission or intent to profit.

* * *

><p>-o0O0o-<p>

"Ildri"  
>By J.T. Magnus, 'Turbo'<p>

-o0O0o-

* * *

><p>It was a peaceful day in Amity Park, New Jersey, and Danny Fenton and Ember McLain were taking advantage of it by enjoying the sunshine and springtime in the park while the ghost dog Cujo played around them, chasing squirrels, butterflies and just about anything else that caught his attention. While normally this would be tempting Murphy, they had seen fit to preempt Murphy's potential involvement with the subtle applications of threats, bribes and a few beatings towards those residents of the Ghost Zone who were most likely to accompany Murphy for an appearance. At the moment, Ember sat in the grass, watching Cujo, while Danny laid there with his head in her lap, smiling up at her.<p>

She shook her head, "You're looking at me like that again."

"I'm looking at you like what?" he asked.

"You know 'like what'," she rolled her eyes.

"And if I am?" he challenged.

She brushed his hair away from his eyes, "Maybe we should do something about it."

"What did you have in mind?"

She turned intangible for a moment, letting his head drop to the ground as she floated into the air, "Catch me if you can, Baby-pop!"

Raising his head, he rubbed the back of it where it had hit the ground and grimaced, "Oh, you're on, Rock Star... Going Ghost!"

Despite the fact that he was on a horizonal plane, the two rings still formed around his mid-section and moved towards his head and feet as he went from human to ghost forms. He floated straight up into the air before twisting and turning so that he was facing his lover.

"Three..."

When Ember took off flying before Danny could say 'two' or 'one', much less 'go', he shook his head and looked to his left, grinning.

"Le femme is such ze enthusiastic one, non? She goes ahead to prepare for us to meet at ze casbah," Danny joked in a Pepe le Pew voice.

Cujo tilted his ghost-dog head to the side, panted twice and then gave a sharp bark in response. Sometimes Master was weird-boy, but Cujo liked Master and Master's Mate being together, so the ghost dog just took it as a sign that Master and Master's Mate were happy together when they chased each other's tails like this. So Cujo happily took off running after Master when Master took off flying after Master's Mate.


	9. Man Bites Dog

Author's Note: The 365 Project is an experimental _multi-fandom_ project to write and post at least one short every day for the next year, not including my semi-regular bi-weekly updates. For more details, see the relevent section in my profile. This is The 365 Project, 19 May.

In the immortal words of Samuel L. Clemens... "Persons attempting to find a motive in this narrative will be prosecuted; persons attempting to find a moral in it will be banished; persons attempting to find a plot in it will be shot. BY ORDER OF THE AUTHOR."

Inspired by a line from "Batman Beyond".

Disclaimer: "Danny Phantom" and all associated characters and situations are created by Butch Hartman and used for entertainment purposes without permission or intent to profit.

* * *

><p>-o0O0o-<p>

"Man Bites Dog"  
>By J.T. Magnus, 'Turbo'<p>

-o0O0o-

* * *

><p>"'Dog bites man', that's not news. 'Man bites dog', now that's news."<p>

* * *

><p>-o0o-<p>

There are some who would argue than any day is better with explosions; not everyone would agree. For some, for many, explosions are considered a bad thing, a sign of chaos and destruction being brought to their lives, their hometowns, their very doorsteps. For Danny Phantom, also known to a few to be Danny Fenton, the sights and sounds of explosions usually meant that another resident of the parallel plane of existance known as 'The Ghost Zone' was loose in the world of the living and causing trouble and therefore it meant that it was time for him to send them back in a thermos - literally, since Danny used a thermos modified by his ghost hunter parents to trap the ghosts that he had to deal with when he was in his own half-ghost form, the result of his parent's 'Ghost Portal' gone wrong.

For whomever had caused the explosions, Danny fully intented to make it a very bad day considering that he'd personally be enjoying a very good one up until then. Flying high over the city of Amity Park, New Jersey, Danny followed the explosions until he reached their source, dropping down to hover just over the streets.

"Skulker," Danny shook his head, "Don't you know there's a noise ordinance around here? Not only do I have to kick your butt now, but the police are probably going to want to write you a ticket."

"Out of my way, whelp," the armored form of Skulker snarled, "It's not your pelt I want today."

"Then why are you here? There a store holding a sale on metal polish or something?" Danny quipped, only to hear a couple of sharp barks followed by a whimper that got his attention, "Cujo?"

The puppy-form of the ghost dog bounded out from behind a set of trash cans to where Danny could see him and gave a bark.

Danny turned his head back towards Skulker, "You're after Cujo?"

Skulker pulled out one of his weapons and gripped it tightly, "That mutt has... 'watered' my realm for the last time!"

Swinging the weapon up, Skulker revealed it to be a rocket launcher as he fired it at Cujo, causing Danny to react by quickly blasting the rocket, obscuring himself and Cujo both in the explosion. When it cleared, Danny hovered there, unharmed, with Cujo laying on the ground behind him - stunned by the concussion of the blast. Danny's eyes narrowed and his voice went hard, his ice-powers unconsciously dropping the temperature around him until a thin sheen of ice covered almost everything as he spoke...

"Nobody hurts my dog."

Skulker barely had time to whimper before Danny began to attack him...

-o0o-

* * *

><p>"What did you want me to see, Dipstick?" a female voice wanted to know as Danny opened the door to his room the next afternoon.<p>

"What do you think of my new decor?" Danny asked, gesturing at the new 'decoration' sitting on top of his bookshelf.

"Oh... my..." She couldn't finish the thought with words, instead turning to look at Danny with wide eyes and a gaping mouth of disbelief.

"Too much?" Danny asked with a grin.

On top of the bookshelf, Skulker's true form of a small green blob pounded on the ghost shield-reinforced glass of a ten-gallon fish tank.

"Release me! I demand you release me now! I am Skulker, greatest hunter of the Ghost Zone! You can't keep me like this! Release me, you whelp!"


	10. Crossroads

Author's Note: The 365 Project is an experimental _multi-fandom_ project to write and post at least one short every day for the next year, not including my semi-regular bi-weekly updates. For more details, see the relevent section in my profile. This is The 365 Project, 20 May.

In the immortal words of Samuel L. Clemens... "Persons attempting to find a motive in this narrative will be prosecuted; persons attempting to find a moral in it will be banished; persons attempting to find a plot in it will be shot. BY ORDER OF THE AUTHOR."

Disclaimer: "Danny Phantom" and all associated characters and situations are created by Butch Hartman and used for entertainment purposes without permission or intent to profit.

* * *

><p>-o0O0o-<p>

"Crossroads"  
>By J.T. Magnus, 'Turbo'<p>

-o0O0o-

* * *

><p>Ember McLain smirked to herself - of all the stages she'd ever thought to be on, this had never been one of them, but when she got the offer, she just had to take it.<p>

"Hey," one of the other artists performing that night called out to her, "You ready for this?"

"I'm not gonna get thrown off the stage if I get a little wild, right?"

"Nah," the other artist grinned, "We'd have thrown Bo out of here long ago if getting wild wasn't allowed."

"Then I think I can handle it," Ember answered, "After all, it's supposed to be a meeting of the music, right?"

"Damn straight," the other artist nodded, "It ain't about steel guitars or electric; what kind of beat you have or whatever... it's all about the music and understanding that a good song's a good song and one you can enjoy, no matter what they call the kind of music."

Ember snorted, liking the music without caring about where it came from, it sounded like a certain dipstick of her acquaintance. Even after fighting her dozens of times, he'd still been caught by her best friend listening to Ember's debut album. It was Kitty's romance-addled mind that had decided that the dipstick liking Ember's music was a sign that they were meant to be together. Not like Ember had an answer to Kitty's argument that even if Phantom was a dipstick, he could still be better than Skulker-who-could-even-hunt-the-remote. But the real 'breakthrough', if one could call it that, was when the youngest of the 'Ghost Zone Girls' had actually tricked Ember and the dipstick and trapped them both in the same Thermos for a week; they still weren't sure what Dani had been trying to accomplish, but when the week was up, they were a couple. It caused the Ghost Zone to polarize; on one side was the dipstick and Ember, Kitty and Johnny, Johnny's Shadow, Wulf, Cujo the Ghost Dog, Dani, Youngblood, Frostbite and the denizens of the Far Frozen and nominally Clockwork... on the other side, just about every other ghost in the Zone. An uneasy truce existed, but everyone knew that the day was growing closer to when something would happen and the Ghost Zone would be changed forever by the aftershocks, perhaps unrecognisibly. For the moment, however, life went on, as did afterlife.

A voice from the other side of the curtain drew Ember out of her thoughts, "Now, everyone please welcome to the Grand Ole Opry as part of our program tonight, Ember McLain!"

That was her cue and as Ember walked out onto the stage of the Grand Ole Opry, her eyes skimmed the crowd until they found her lover and her little sister-slash-daughter.

Ember smiled, all she had to do was think about them and everything else would be easy, "Hello, Nashville!"


	11. Triskaideka

Author's Note: The 365 Project is an experimental _multi-fandom_ project to write and post at least one short every day for the next year, not including my semi-regular bi-weekly updates. For more details, see the relevent section in my profile. This is The 365 Project, 13 June.

In the immortal words of Samuel L. Clemens... "Persons attempting to find a motive in this narrative will be prosecuted; persons attempting to find a moral in it will be banished; persons attempting to find a plot in it will be shot. BY ORDER OF THE AUTHOR."

Disclaimer: "Danny Phantom" and all associated characters and situations are created by Butch Hartman and used for entertainment purposes without permission or intent to profit.

* * *

><p>-o0O0o-<p>

"Triskaideka"  
>By J.T. Magnus, 'Turbo'<p>

-o0O0o-

* * *

><p>It wasn't hard to figure out that who a ghost was in death was based on who they were in life; Ember was a musician, Kitty was a party-girl, Youngblood was just a kid, Phantom hunted ghosts... Skulker hunted everything... He played up the biker angle so no-body ever stopped to think about where the rest of it came from, like his Shadow. Nobody ever stopped to think about why he was Johnny <em>13<em> and not Johnny Motor or Johnny Shadow or Johnny Two-Wheels.

As a human, he had been born on Friday The Thirteenth; as a human, he had died on Friday The Thirteenth. In between, he'd been considered to be bad luck by superstitious and overly-religious parents who believed that his birth on such a day was a sign of weakness in his soul and who took to trying to 'force the devil out of him' whenever they had a chance. Nothing was allowed on the radio but doom-and-gloom religious talk shows and gospel music, there was no television in the house, he grew up with no privacy even in his own room - which was barely worth considering as 'his' room as his parents had done the 'decorating' if it could be called that and forbid him to change anything - as they would come in to 'inspect' it whenever they felt like.

He'd rebelled fast and hard as soon as he found an opening. He'd started hanging out with the kids at school from 'the wrong side of the tracks', one of them had even started supplying him with clothes to change into once he got to school that didn't make him look like a priest in training - though he'd always had to change back before the end of the day since he couldn't wear those clothes home. The guy had even given Johnny a by on one of the most sacred rules and actually introduced Johnny to his sister. Kitty was everything his parents hated, everything they considered wrong with the world, and so she quickly became one of the most important things in Johnny's life. She was wild and untamed, the kind of bad girl that tempts every good boy to cross the road - and despite all of his parents' efforts, Johnny wasn't that good to begin with, so Kitty didn't exactly have to work very hard at it.

It was Senior year when Valentine's Day fell on a Saturday, so it had been the brilliant idea of some school faculty members to hold that year's Valentine's Day Dance on the Friday before to, as they put it, 'ward off the bad luck with the power of love'. Nobody ever connected the string of bad luck that had plagued that idiot until they had quit working at the school to become a rodeo clown with the fact that two students had ended up dying on that Friday night. It had been like something out of one of those cheese teeny-bopper rock songs; the school dance, the couple from 'different sides of the tracks', the motorcycle borrowed from the girl's brother, the rainy night, the curve in the road, the accident that killed them both...

He'd found out later that Kitty's family had paid for _both_ of their funerals; even when he was dead, Johnny's parents didn't want anything to do with their 'spiritually weak' son, going so far as to disown him for 'allowing the devil to corrupt his soul'. When he learned that, Johnny returned the favor, throwing aside his parents' name; he was born on the Thirteenth, he had died on the Thirteenth... he was now Johnny 13 and he'd make his own luck.


	12. Wake-up

Author's Note: The 365 Project is an experimental _multi-fandom_ project to write and post at least one short every day for the next year, not including my semi-regular bi-weekly updates. For more details, see the relevent section in my profile. This is The 365 Project, 15 June.

In the immortal words of Samuel L. Clemens... "Persons attempting to find a motive in this narrative will be prosecuted; persons attempting to find a moral in it will be banished; persons attempting to find a plot in it will be shot. BY ORDER OF THE AUTHOR."

Disclaimer: "Danny Phantom" and all associated characters and situations are created by Butch Hartman and used for entertainment purposes without permission or intent to profit.

* * *

><p>-o0O0o-<p>

"Wake-up"  
>By J.T. Magnus, 'Turbo'<p>

-o0O0o-

* * *

><p>She felt the bed shift as the man beside her sat up and turned to put his feet to the floor.<p>

"Hmm... stay," she murmured without opening her eyes.

He looked back at her and smiled softly, "If only I could... Responsibilities call."

"Tell them to leave a message and get your cute butt back over here," she retorted with a groan, drifting further and further away from the warm embrace of sleep.

"I'll be back before you've known it," he promised.

She snorted into her pillow, "Too late."

Standing up, he took his side of the blanket and pulled it up to his pillow as he replied, "Keep the bed warm for me."

"The longer you take, the colder it'll get," was the answer he got.

His jaw twitched at the - he wasn't entirely sure if it was supposed to be a joke, a tease, a warning, ultimatum or what, and he took a deep breath.

"Going Ghost!"


	13. Collecting I - Locker-Stuck

Author's Note: The 365 Project is an experimental _multi-fandom_ project to write and post at least one short every day for the next year, not including my semi-regular bi-weekly updates. For more details, see the relevent section in my profile. This is The 365 Project, 22 June.

In the immortal words of Samuel L. Clemens... "Persons attempting to find a motive in this narrative will be prosecuted; persons attempting to find a moral in it will be banished; persons attempting to find a plot in it will be shot. BY ORDER OF THE AUTHOR."

Disclaimer: "Danny Phantom" and all associated characters and situations are created by Butch Hartman and used for entertainment purposes without permission or intent to profit.

* * *

><p>-o0O0o-<p>

"Locker-stuck and Over A Barrel"

By J.T. Magnus, 'Turbo'

-o0O0o-

* * *

><p>It started out a normal day at Casper High School in Amity Park, New Jersey. Like most days, it began with Quarterback of the football team Dash Baxter preparing to stuff school geek Daniel 'Danny' Fenton into his locker, one of Dash's favorite extracurricular activities.<p>

"Morning, Fenturd!" Dash announced as he spun Danny around and grabbed him by the shirt collar, "It's time for your locker inspection."

"Uh... Dash... can't we talk about this?" Danny tried to shrug.

"Nah, I got a busy schedule today," Dash retorted, "Places to go, lockers to stuff."

"If you're really busy, we can reschedule - say, next April?" Danny offered.

"Dream on, Fenturd," Dash snorted, using his free hand to push Danny's locker door open wider, causing the football player to notice the picture taped to the inside of the locker door and snort again, "Yeah, dream on, Fenturd."

Danny closed his eyes and braced himself, wincing as he felt his back slam against the back of his locker and the clanging of the metal door being slammed shut in front of him. He waited a few minutes to be sure that Dash and his buddies were gone before he opened his eyes, ending up eye to eye with the picture taped to his locker door, taken from a magazine cover some months ago.

"Well, looks like it's just you and me, Blue," Danny remarked to the picture.

The 'Moving Boulder' magazine cover picture with the caption of 'The Spirit of The Seventies Lives Again: Ember McLain Speaks Out' didn't say a word in reply.

"Not much of a conversationalist, huh?" Danny closed his eyes and tilted his head back, "That's fine, if the real Ember ever finds out about you, she'll do enough talk - and enough yelling at me - for both of you. Well, I better get out of this and get to class. Going Ghost!"

Transforming into his alter-ego, Danny phased through the locker door and into the now-empty hallway before reverting back to human form, "Well, see you after class, Blue."

With that, he quickly pressed the first two fingers of his left hand to his lips and tapped them against the locker door he had just passed through before using his right hand to scoop up his backpack and taking off down the hall towards class.

* * *

><p>-o0O0o-<p>

Author's Note: And now for something completely different...

What do you think would happen if Danny found the Mask of Loki and instead of becoming Danny Phantom becomes The Mask - the wacky, wild movie version, not the darker version of the original comics?


	14. Collecting II - Artistic

Author's Note: The 365 Project is an experimental _multi-fandom_ project to write and post at least one short every day for the next year, not including my semi-regular bi-weekly updates. For more details, see the relevent section in my profile. This is The 365 Project, 28 June.

In the immortal words of Samuel L. Clemens... "Persons attempting to find a motive in this narrative will be prosecuted; persons attempting to find a moral in it will be banished; persons attempting to find a plot in it will be shot. BY ORDER OF THE AUTHOR."

Disclaimer: "Danny Phantom" and all associated characters and situations are created by Butch Hartman and used for entertainment purposes without permission or intent to profit. I'm tempted to make a bad 'Full Metal Jacket' joke...

* * *

><p>-o0O0o-<p>

"Artistic"

By J.T. Magnus, 'Turbo'

-o0O0o-

* * *

><p>He had his guilty pleasures. Everyone had their guilty pleasures. Sometimes, they didn't even feel guilty about having them. He didn't. Certain of his guilty pleasures involved one of the ghosts he fought; he collected her. He had her album, the posters from that first concert he had busted up, tapes of her music video and pictures from magazines she had been in. He had plenty of those. Among his favorites were a picture of her that hung in his locker at school, another which was on the back of his closet door...<p>

And there was the one currently laying on the table between Danny and his parents instead of sitting in its proper place on his nightstand, the one that didn't come from any magazine, instead it came directly from the ghost-girl herself - complete with personal message. Maddie Fenton slapped her hand down on the table next to the framed picture of Ember McLain, only the ghostly rock star's guitar giving any cover or thought to modesty. The message written on the picture clearly proclaimed, 'Thanks for all the fun, Baby-Pop - Ember' and was further signed with a lip-print in blue lipstick.

"What do you have to say for yourself, Danny?" Maddie demanded of her son.

"Uh..." Danny thought for a moment, "It's artistic?"

Maddie glared at her son, "Daniel James Fenton... I demand an explanation for this... this... This!"

Danny stood up and before his parents could react, he'd snatched the picture up and tucked it under his arm, "You _demand_ an explanation? _Demand_? You don't get to demand anything, not from me, not anymore."

"Danny, we're your parents," Jack started.

"Oh, now you remember that?" Danny cut him off, "You always seemed to forget that whenever you had a choice between me and Jazz or your ghost research! You lost the right to demand anything when you weren't there and I had to turn to my friends for help that should've came from you."

Danny turned and started to storm out of the room, pausing only long enough to throw back over his shoulder, "And that means stay out of my room, too!"


	15. Collecting III - Completing The Set

Author's Note: The 365 Project is an experimental _multi-fandom_ project to write and post at least one short every day for the next year, not including my semi-regular bi-weekly updates. For more details, see the relevent section in my profile. This is The 365 Project, 29 June.

In the immortal words of Samuel L. Clemens... "Persons attempting to find a motive in this narrative will be prosecuted; persons attempting to find a moral in it will be banished; persons attempting to find a plot in it will be shot. BY ORDER OF THE AUTHOR."

Disclaimer: "Danny Phantom" and all associated characters and situations are created by Butch Hartman and used for entertainment purposes without permission or intent to profit. When I first wrote "Lockerstuck", I wasn't planning on continuing the idea, but it just wanted to be a trine, it seems...

No "Phantom Planet" in this continuity, sorry.

* * *

><p>-o0O0o-<p>

"Collecting Ember"  
>'Completing The Set'<br>By J.T. Magnus, 'Turbo'

-o0O0o-

* * *

><p>It had been almost a year and a half since G-Day, the day Danny Fenton had thrown down the gauntlet between his parents and himself. The relationship between them, already strained, had never recovered. He'd moved out as soon as he had graduated from Casper High and, despite still having frequent contact with his sister Jazz, hadn't seen or heard from his parents since. It had actually been a relief, a weight off of his shoulder to be away from his parents' narrow-minded attitudes and ghost-hunting obsession, to be safe from the fear that any time they might discover his secret and fulfill their desire to 'dissect the ghost-child molecule by molecule'.<p>

He'd never been sure how it happened; sure, Ember had been a hot rock star when he had been a hormonal teenager, but she'd also been one of his enemies, so when had he started thinking of her _that_ way? Was it after discovering that she had been dating Skulker and wondering how a little green armor-wearing ball of snot could get a girl like Ember when the thought had crossed his mind that if Skulker could do it, he could? It wasn't long after that when he'd begun collecting her, so to speak. Her album, magazines with her in them, posters, pictures, whatever he could find about her that would help him understand her. It was ironic, their relationship hadn't come from a painstakingly planned seduction on his part, hadn't come from Youngblood teasing them both after discovering that Danny had Ember's picture in his locker...

It had came about because Skulker pissed Ember off when she caught him cheating on her and she wanted revenge on the 'Greatest Hunter in the Ghost Zone'. In her eyes, revenge was a dish best served by waiting until she knew Skulker was nearby, then ambushing Danny and pulling him into a full-blown makeout session - no fake-out involved - before he could even figure out what was happening. Then she not only disappeared and left him there to deal with a berserk Skulker, she'd left him in serious need of a cold shower as well. She probably thought she was embarrassing him when a week later he arrived home to find a package on his bed containing the pin-up style picture of Ember that would eventually bring things with his parents to a head. Contrary to her expectations, however, Danny had decided that picture was the new jewel of his collection. She also was prepared for his idea of revenge-slash-thanks when he caught her by surprise in the Ghost Zone a few weeks later and returned the favor of kissing her senseless right in front of two of her best friends. Okay, even if Ember had been stunned, Kitty had still kicked his butt for it, but it was worth it when Johnny sent his Shadow by later with a message approving of what Danny'd done and adding that the ghost biker had never seen Ember that speechless before. Encounters between the two had continued in that vein over the six months preceeding the fallout between Danny and his parents and then afterwards for another eighteen months; instead of physical or ectoplasmic combat, each seeking to outdo the other by other means. Two years after it had begun, a nineteen-year-old Danny Fenton decided it was time to play his trump card and complete his Ember collection with the rocker herself...

Knowing Ember's usual haunts like he did - and mentally wincing when he realised the bad ghost pun - it didn't take Danny long to find the place where she was hanging out, strumming her guitar. It was far more difficult for him to sneak up on Ember without her noticing him, but despite a few tense moments, he was finally able to pull it off.

"What're you up to, Blue?" Danny asked suddenly, taking Ember by surprise and causing her to twist around to face him at the same time as he grabbed her hand and slipped an engagement ring on her finger.

Ember jerked her hand back and stared at what he had just done, "What the hell is this, Dipstick?"

"We're getting married," Danny announced matter-of-factly.

"Just who the hell do you think you are, Dipstick, stuffing a ring on my finger and telling me we're getting married like I don't have any choice in the matter?"

Danny looked at her with a smirk, "The guy who plans to have you screaming his name and begging for me to marry you before the night's out, Ms. McLain, soon-to-be Mrs. Fenton."

"Never gonna happen, Dipstick," Ember snorted and reached to pull the ring off, only for Danny to stop her.

"I'll make you a bet," he stated, "The ring stays on tonight and if, by the time morning comes, you still want to take it off... you can go ahead and take it off."

"What the hell makes you think I'm going to take your stupid bet, Dipstick?" Ember snarled, trying to pull her hand away from the one Danny was holding it with to keep her from pulling the ring off.

Danny's smirk deepened, "Because if you don't, word's going to get around the Ghost Zone that the great Ember McLain..."

He leaned over and his breath was hot in her ear, "...is afraid she'll lose to the Phantom."

"Bring it on, Dipstick," Ember snarled and used his grip on her hand to pull him down on top of her...

Eight months later, a gold band joined the engagement ring on Ember's hand to complete the set.


	16. Third Time's Charm

Author's Note: The 365 Project is an experimental _multi-fandom_ project to write and post at least one short every day for the next year, not including my semi-regular bi-weekly updates. For more details, see the relevent section in my profile. This is The 365 Project, 7 September.

In the immortal words of Samuel L. Clemens... "Persons attempting to find a motive in this narrative will be prosecuted; persons attempting to find a moral in it will be banished; persons attempting to find a plot in it will be shot. BY ORDER OF THE AUTHOR."

Disclaimer: "Danny Phantom" and all associated characters and situations are created by Butch Hartman and used for entertainment purposes without permission or intent to profit. Sorry, but no 'Phantom Planet' in most of my stories.

Pairings: Danny/Ember

* * *

><p>-o0O0o-<p>

"Third Time's Charm"  
>By J.T. Magnus, 'Turbo'<p>

-o0O0o-

* * *

><p>As the morning sun shined into his eyes and woke him, Danny Fenton had reached a very important conclusion; he was never letting Johnny Thirteen talk him into anything ever again. He'd known the guy for years, since he had started high school in fact, so long that it was easy for Danny to forget one important fact; ghosts don't experience hangovers, even if half-ghosts do. And since most of the people that knew Danny both as Daniel 'Danny' Fenton and as Danny Phantom were ghosts, he spent a lot of time around them. Especially those that were less 'enemies' and more like 'rivals' like Johnny and Kitty, Youngblood and the like. With his head pounding like it was being hit by John Henry's hammer, Danny managed to sit up and tried to gain enough of his orientation to figure out where he was and thus where the closest asprin probably was as well. Instead of asprin that would relieve his headache, he found himself looking at something that only made part of his head hurt worse.<p>

"Oh, boy..."

His soft complaint was enough to wake the woman in the bed next to him and she sat up, holding the blanket to her chest and groaning as she saw him there.

"Not again," Ember McLain muttered as she realised that she had gone to bed with Danny Phantom last night.

"This is getting ridiculous," Danny agreed, "This is the third time this month..."


	17. Crossroads II - On Stage

Author's Note: The 365 Project is an experimental _multi-fandom_ project to write and post at least one short every day for the next year, not including my semi-regular bi-weekly updates. For more details, see the relevent section in my profile. This is The 365 Project, 16 September.

In the immortal words of Samuel L. Clemens... "Persons attempting to find a motive in this narrative will be prosecuted; persons attempting to find a moral in it will be banished; persons attempting to find a plot in it will be shot. BY ORDER OF THE AUTHOR."

Disclaimer: "Danny Phantom" and all associated characters and situations are created by Butch Hartman and used for entertainment purposes without permission or intent to profit. Sorry, but no 'Phantom Planet' in most of my stories. "Fist City" is the property of and is performed by Ms. Loretta Lynn.

Pairings: Danny/Ember

* * *

><p>-o0O0o-<p>

"Crossroads"

'On Stage'

By J.T. Magnus, 'Turbo'

-o0O0o-

* * *

><p>"Hello, Nashville!" Ember McLain called out as she walked out onto the stage of the Grand Ole Opry, admitting with a grin, "I'm still not entirely sure that I'm on the right stage, you know that?"<p>

The other performer on the stage, Lynette Elke gave a big smile as she answered, "We get that a lot from our guests. But don't worry, darlin', we're all just one big welcoming family here."

"That's part of what worries me," Ember replied, "I've got a 'bad girl of Rock 'n' Roll' reputation, that doesn't always go down well with country types."

"Oh, like I said, don't worry; we've had a few people go against the family traditions, but we still like them fine," Lynette told the blue-haired girl, "Now I don't know about you, but I think I came out here to sing tonight, how about you?"

"Well..." Ember looked out into the audience where Danny and Dani were sitting, "Came all the way out here, might as well, huh?"

"So, anything you think you like from country?"

"Actually, yeah," Ember smirked, "I think we could take a little trip..."

"Take a trip, where to?"

Ember raised her gloved hand up where everyone could see before she clenched it into a fist, "Fist City."

"Okay, I think we can go there," Lynette nodded and began to play the opening notes to the song before starting to sing, "Now, you've been making your brags around town that you've been a-lovin' my man. But the man I love when he picks up trash, he puts it in a garbage can, and that's what you look like to me, and what I see's a pity; you better close your face and stay outta my way if you don't wanna go to Fist City."

While Lynette had been playing, Ember had joined in with her guitar even if not singing yet, then the country artist reached the chorus; "If you don't wanna go to Fist City, you better detour around my town, 'cause I'll grab you by the hair of the head and I'll lift you off the ground. I'm not a-sayin' my baby's a saint, 'cause he ain't, but that he won't cat around with a kitty. I'm here to tell you, gal, to lay off'a my man if you don't wanna go to Fist City."

Ember developed the beginnings of a thousand-yard stare as her eyes narrowed at someone who wasn't there except in the rock star's own mind, "Come on, tell me what you told your friends if you think you're brave enough. Come on and show me what 'a real woman' is, since you think you're hot stuff. You've bit off more than you can chew, and what I'm gonna do ain't pretty. Yeah, better move your feet if you don't wanna eat a meal that's called Fist City."

"If you don't wanna go to Fist City, you better detour around my town, 'cause you'll meet me, then you'll meet my right," Ember raised her right fist into the air to emphasis her words, " - and then you'll be meetin' the ground."

The ghost rocker looked at Danny out in the audience and winked, "I'm not sayin' my Baby-pop's a saint, 'cause he ain't, but that you don't want to try to be cute or witty. This is your last chance to stay away from my man if you don't wanna go to Fist City."

"Yeah, we're here to tell you, girls, to lay off of our men if you don't wanna go to Fist City," the two performers sang into the mic together.

"Sounds like you were singing that at someone, Ember," Lynette remarked over the applause of the crowd.

"Damn right," Ember grinned, sure that the person she had been directing it at was watching the show just because she and Danny were together and he was there in the crowd. Old friend of his or not, if she didn't back off, Ember wasn't just going to take her to Fist City, she was gonna give that goth the grand tour.


	18. Hold This

Author's Note: The 365 Project is an experimental _multi-fandom_ project to write and post at least one short every day for the next year, not including my semi-regular bi-weekly updates. For more details, see the relevent section in my profile. This is The 365 Project, 18 September.

In the immortal words of Samuel L. Clemens... "Persons attempting to find a motive in this narrative will be prosecuted; persons attempting to find a moral in it will be banished; persons attempting to find a plot in it will be shot. BY ORDER OF THE AUTHOR."

Disclaimer: "Danny Phantom" and all associated characters and situations are created by Butch Hartman and used for entertainment purposes without permission or intent to profit. Sorry, but no 'Phantom Planet' in most of my stories.

Pairings: Danny/Ember (primary), Ember/Skulker (minor)

* * *

><p>-o0O0o-<p>

"Hold This"  
>By J.T. Magnus, 'Turbo'<p>

-o0O0o-

* * *

><p>He'd never admit it to Tucker - especially after that incident with Desiree and his wishing to be 'Tucker Phantom' because he was jealous of being stuck as the 'sidekick' while Danny was the 'hero' - but sometimes Danny 'Phantom' Fenton considered Johnny Thirteen one of his best friends. Most of their fights didn't have any real aggression to them, they were just fights, and they hung out as much as they fought sometimes - more so after that mess with Kitty trying to date Danny while Danny tried to help Johnny get back together with her. It was the kind of thing that brought men together in mutual respect and comiseration over the females of their species.<p>

"You're lucky, you know," Danny remarked finally, "Even when Kitty's running cold, she's not actually trying to kill you."

"We're ghosts, Phantom," Johnny reminded him, "We don't get killed."

"Vaporised, dissected, whatever," Danny shrugged, "Paulina wants 'Inviso-Bill' and wants Fenton to go away, Valerie wants Fenton and wants to blast Phantom... and I don't know what Sam wants, tell you the truth."

"You're talking in third- or fourth-person again," the full-ghost pointed out to the halfa.

As it turned out, Danny had learned something from hanging around Johnny; root beer affected ghosts like beer itself affected the living. One of his personal 'tells' that he was having too much, it turned out, was when he started referring to the Danny Phantom and the Danny Fenton that people saw as seperate from himself. How stupid could they be, really, not to figure out that 'Phantom' and 'Fenton' were the same person? It wasn't even that creative a name considering how similar the names were... It was the kind of thing only a fifteen year old could come up with and think was 'cool'.

"I think..." Danny picked up his root beer bottle and shook it gently, watching the liquid move, "Doc's changed his recipe. I'm only on my second bottle..."

Johnny shook his head, Danny was an okay guy when he wasn't acting all heroic, but he couldn't hold his root beer sometimes. As if by chance, he looked past Danny's shoulder and ended up rolling his eyes with a groan.

"What?"

"Skember," Johnny answered, nodding towards behind Danny.

The halfa winced, he'd never gotten the whole merged name when it came to couples like 'Brangelina', 'Bennifer' or 'Skember'... he still couldn't get what Ember saw in Skulker in the first place, for that matter.

"Do I even want to know?" Danny muttered.

Johnny tooked Danny's root beer out of his hand and drank down what was left in the bottle before answering, "The usual; 'I am Skulker. I am the greatest hunter in the Ghost Zone. All should fear me. I'm really a little green worm and I wear a massive suit of armor to compensate'... the usual."

"And of course," Danny added without turning to look, "He can't see three feet in front of him to see that Ember is just not interested in hearing him talk about himself again."

"Yep," Johnny nodded.

Danny sighed, "Well, I'm bored anyway... Hey, Doc!"

The bartender drifted down from the end of the bar, "Wh-wh-what'll it be, f-f-Phantom?"

Danny jerked his thumb at Johnny, "Another one of those since he took mine."

"Sh-sh-sure thing," Doc nodded, turning around to take a bottle down off the shelf behind the bar and then turning back to set it down, "He-he-here ya go."

"Thanks, Doc," Danny grinned at him before striking the top of the bottle against the edge of the bar, catching the lid and popping it off - causing it to hit Johnny when it did.

"Da-da-don't do that!" Doc complained, "Ya-ya-you'll scratch my bar! Ah-ah-and don't go wrecking the place, either!"

"No promises, Doc," Danny remarked as he stood up, causing Doc to swear vehemently as the halfa started on his way across the room.

So engrossed was he in telling of his own glory, Skulker didn't even notice Danny walk up behind him until the halfa tapped him on the head with the bottom of his bottle. When that happened, he spun and snarled...

"What do you want, whelp?" Skulker demanded.

"Just thought I'd share an observation, Skulker," Danny commented casually, "Ever time I see you and Ember, you're always concerned about yourself and paying no attention to her... Here's my observation; she's smoking hot, you idiot."

Skulker glared at Danny, missing the remark causing Ember to blush slightly.

"Fortunately, " Danny added as he walked around the table to where he was now standing between Skulker and Ember, "I've come up with a solution for the problem... Hold out your hand and - "

"Are you _joking_, whelp?" Skulker interrupted with a snap.

"No, man, I ain't joking..." Danny replied, "Hold my beer while I kiss your girlfriend, 'cause she needs a real man, not a boy like you."

"What!" Two voices shouted; Ember in surprise and Skulker in anger."

"I said," Danny answered, "You don't see what you're missin', but man, I do..." Danny held out his drink, "So, here, hold my beer."

"You dare mock the greatest hunter of the Ghost Zone, whelp? Your pelt shall adorn my wall!" Skulker roared as he stood up, shoving his chair back and making it fall backwards to the floor.

Danny looked at Ember and pointed at Skulker with his free hand, "See, there he goes again..."

Turning to look at the hunter, Danny continued, "You know what? I don't blame you for wanting to fight, but I told Doc I wouldn't wreck the place... If you still want later, we can take it outside; but for now... do me a favor... and hold my beer while I kiss your girlfriend."

Now Danny took his free hand and slipped it under Ember's arm and pulled her to her feet and close in to him.

"What are you doing?" Skulker demanded of his girlfriend when he noticed the blush on her face, "Strike him down!"

Ember was in a state of turmoil; on one hand, she and the dipstick had been enemies for years and she was supposed to be dating Skulker... on the other hand, Skulker spent most of his time talking about himself and ignoring her, but the dipstick was calling her hot and wanting to kiss her... and it wasn't like he hadn't grown up well from that shrimp that she first fought and besides, Skulker never wanted to take off his armor, even when they were alone... Then there were the chills that went through her body when the dipstick had touched her...

Ember started to laugh at herself, was she really trying to convince herself to stay with Skulker when after all these years he hadn't done anything to deserve it?

"Stupid girl, attack the whelp!" Skulker demanded again.

Ember turned murderous eyes on Skulker at that, "'Stupid girl', huh? At least I have the record sales to prove I'm a rock star, no one's ever even seen the 'wall of pelts' you keep going on about, so the only one who can say you're a hunter is you... Well, guys like you, you ain't good for nothing! Well, hold on a second, you've got to be good for something... for something..."

"I know," Danny informed her, "Since he's still standing here, he can hold my beer."

This time, Danny didn't even wait for Skulker to respond, placing his bottle into the hunter's hand and catching Ember by surprise as he now grabbed her hand with the one that had been holding his drink.

"But don't drop it!" Danny cautioned, "Seriously, don't drop it, cause I just got it. Thanks, I'm just gonna be over here dancing with your girlfriend."

"You know what, Baby-pop?" Ember informed him as he led her out onto the dance floor, "That last bit's up for discussion."


	19. Talk The Talk

Author's Note: The 365 Project is an experimental _multi-fandom_ project to write and post at least one short every day for the next year, not including my semi-regular bi-weekly updates. For more details, see the relevent section in my profile. This is The 365 Project, 19 September. You know what _that_ means... arr...

In the immortal words of Samuel L. Clemens... "Persons attempting to find a motive in this narrative will be prosecuted; persons attempting to find a moral in it will be banished; persons attempting to find a plot in it will be shot. BY ORDER OF THE AUTHOR."

Disclaimer: "Danny Phantom" and all associated characters and situations are created by Butch Hartman and used for entertainment purposes without permission or intent to profit. Sorry, but no 'Phantom Planet' in most of my stories.

* * *

><p>-o0O0o-<p>

"Talk The Talk"  
>By J.T. Magnus, 'Turbo'<p>

-o0O0o-

* * *

><p>Danny Fenton was sure he had forgotten something as he walked alone towards Casper High; alone because his usual companions had both said something about having things they had to take care of today. That only enhanced the feeling that he was having that he was forgetting something. Feeling a chill in the air, Danny stopped walking and exhaled a blue mist.<p>

"Ahoy, Dipstick! Strike yer colors and heave-to!"

Turning around and looking skyward, Danny frowned at the sight of Ember wearing something other than her usual black punk-rocker outfit - specifically, the same black pants with red and torquoise corset that she had worn during the time she and Youngblood were brainwashing all of Amity Park's adults.

"What are you doing, Ember?" Danny asked, "Playing with Youngblood again?"

Ember groaned, "Trust a landlubber like ye not ta know what day it be, arr... 'tis September Nineteenth, cully, and ye best be ta talkin' right or I be seein' ta ye walkin' the plank."

Now it was Danny's turn to groan, that was what he had forgotten, that 'International Talk Like A Pirate Day' thing; the day that beat out Halloween for the sheer number of people putting on eyepatches and running around with plastic swords going 'arr'. It had only gotten more prominent after those movies had came out, too.

"Look, Ember, I don't have time for this, I have to get to school. I _have_ to go to school; I've been absent nine times - nine times. One more and they send the cops around to talk to my folks and we all know that won't turn out well," Danny rambled.

"Arr, raise the bones and black and give the naval curs what-for, me bucko," Ember countered as she drifted down to land on the ground in front of him, "Show yer black heart and let the devil take the likes of them."

"Okay, seriously?" Danny looked at her, "Could you please stop, because that's getting kinda creepy."

"What's the matter, dipstick, don't want to play 'the Pirate Queen and the dashing and heroic cabin boy'?" Ember teased salaciously, "Or maybe you'd prefer 'the Pirate Captain and the innocent, yet nubile, colony governor's daughter'?"

Danny pinched his nose as he tried to move his mind away from the train of thought those comments had brought up, that he knew Ember meant for those comments to bring up, "I'm surprised you even know what some of those words mean, Ember."

It wasn't something he talked about openly, but Ember had become one of his hardest opponents to fight lately, mainly because she had started using herself as her weapon as much as her guitar, pressing up against him and distracting him during fights or even just whenever she felt like it. Considering that this was the same ghostly rock star who had put him under a love spell for one of his best friends to distract him the first time they had fought, Danny wasn't sure what Ember was trying to do. That made him nervous; the ghosts with straightforward plans and goals were easy to deal with, but Danny didn't always know how to handle it when they got creative. Them getting creative usually meant he had to get creative on the fly - not that having people around like his parents who shot first and didn't bother with questions didn't already help with that.

"What, just because I'm a rocker means I can't be intelligent?" Ember snapped at him, "Take a look at Gene Simmons' educational background sometime, dipstick; the man has more degrees than you have brain cells!"

Danny was getting rather tired of everyone thinking they could just insult him whenever they felt like it and grabbed Ember by the wrist, pulling her to him and putting his arms around her to restrain her as he snapped, "Belay that gabber, or I'll keel-haul ye, Wench! Fore and aft!"

Ember tried not to blush or react in any other visible way as she thought to herself, _'It's so wrong that this is turning me on like this... I am not that kind of girl - I'm not, I'm not, I'm not... but damn if he's not making me want to be...'_

'_Oh, crap, what am I supposed to do now?' _were Danny's own thoughts as he began to realise just what he had done. So panicked was he by what he had just done that he never noticed another ghost in the area.

When he saw Ember dressed up in a pirate outfit doing something with Phantom's human form, Youngblood - clad in a black do-gi, mask and hood, with a ninja-to strapped to his back - frowned and grumbled to himself, "Come on, doesn't _anybody_ want to play 'Ninja' today?"


	20. They're Taking Who Where?

Author's Note: The 365 Project is an experimental _multi-fandom_ project to write and post at least one short every day for the next year, not including my semi-regular bi-weekly updates. For more details, see the relevent section in my profile. This is The 365 Project, 22 September.

In the immortal words of Samuel L. Clemens... "Persons attempting to find a motive in this narrative will be prosecuted; persons attempting to find a moral in it will be banished; persons attempting to find a plot in it will be shot. BY ORDER OF THE AUTHOR."

Disclaimer: "Danny Phantom" and all associated characters and situations are created by Butch Hartman and used for entertainment purposes without permission or intent to profit. Sorry, but no 'Phantom Planet' in most of my stories.

Pairings: ...none, actually, this time.

* * *

><p>-o0O0o-<p>

"They're Taking Who Where?"  
>By J.T. Magnus, 'Turbo'<p>

-o0O0o-

"They're taking the hobbits to Isengard!" - Legolas, 'Lord of The Rings: The Two Towers'.

-o0O0o-

* * *

><p>She had reached the only logical conclusion possible; her friends had finally lost it and gone completely insane. Not the good kind of creative insane involving cutting off one's own ear and creating masterful paintings, but rather the kind that resulted in rooms with padded walls and a nice new jacket - with plenty of straps and buckles to keep it on the wearer. Well, it wasn't like she hadn't expected it from Danny sooner or later, really. All someone had to do was look at the fact that both his parents were insane and they'd understand that odds were against him. It would had to have happened eventually. She just hadn't expected Tucker to go insane at the same time and leave her as the only living sane being in Amity Park. Tucker had spent the entire day listening to the same song playing on his PDA over and over again, the same mix of techno-electronic-pop and random lyrics for hours...<p>

And Danny had not only come to school barefoot, but he'd brought his lunch in a suitcase, he had brought so much food that he had to carry it around in a suitcase, it was unbelievable. Then he couldn't even wait until lunch to eat, he'd actually started pulling food out of his suitcase in the middle of Lancer's class. She still didn't understand what had happened. Lancer had actually looked at Danny's bare feet and the food on his desk and asked about 'Elevensies'. Danny had answered that it was his 'Second Breakfast'. She had been waiting for him to recieve detention, friend or not. After all, Lancer never reacted calmly to any percieved troublemaking on Danny's part, it just never happened...

He certainly never showed that he was also barefoot and then proceeded to draw the entire class into some kind of discussion over some set of books and their effect on real life. Usually he didn't seem to care about real life, just books and rules, so she didn't know what to think... And Tucker was still listening to that stupid song...

"Tucker!" She finally snapped at him, "How long do you plan to keep playing the same music on that stupid thing?"

"Well," he answered carefully, "This is the Ten-Hour Mix, and it's only been about six... so, four more hours?"

At that statement, she did the only reasonable thing; she screamed in frustration and began chasing Tucker, intending to smash his PDA and end at least part of the insanity.


	21. Grave Hunting

Author's Note: The 365 Project is an experimental _multi-fandom_ project to write and post at least one short every day for the next year, not including my semi-regular bi-weekly updates. For more details, see the relevent section in my profile. This is The 365 Project, 19 October.

In the immortal words of Samuel L. Clemens... "Persons attempting to find a motive in this narrative will be prosecuted; persons attempting to find a moral in it will be banished; persons attempting to find a plot in it will be shot. BY ORDER OF THE AUTHOR."

Disclaimer: "Danny Phantom" and all associated characters and situations are created by Butch Hartman and used for entertainment purposes without permission or intent to profit.

* * *

><p>-o0O0o-<p>

"Grave Hunting"

By J.T. Magnus, 'Turbo'

-o0O0o-

* * *

><p>He didn't want to be like his parents when it came to ghosts and since their attitude was 'blast first, dissect second, ask questions never', he found himself asking questions and trying to understand first whenever he could. That was why he spent his free time trying to find his enemies' graves, he considered it the first step on the path to understand who they were and how life - and death - had made them that way. He still wasn't sure why he had developed the habit. It was easier with Kitty and Johnny; they had actually taken him to theirs. Others were easy to find, like Penelope Spectra's and Youngblood's - including discovering that Youngblood's full name was Peter Youngblood when he was looking for the 'master of make-believe's.' Others were innately harder or simply impossible; how do you find a grave when you only know someone as 'The Box Ghost', 'The Lunch Lady', or even as 'The Ghost Writer'?<p>

But Danny still tried. The site he was at currently was the last of the 'easy' finds. The October night was cold and he couldn't feel it because of his ghost powers, but still he wore a jacket for appearances' sake. Carefully, Danny reached into one of the pockets of his jacket and pulled out a small item, looking at it for a moment in the moonlight before laying it on top of the headstone and turning to walk away. At the edge of the cemetary, he paused and turned back for one last look; he couldn't see it from here, but he knew that somewhere out among all the others was a headstone engraved with the name 'Amberlynn McLain' and that she was born Feburary 3, 1959 and died August 16, 1977. The corners of Danny's mouth pulled up in the slightest of smiles, somehow, that didn't surprise him knowing Ember, those dates...


	22. GH II - Midnight In Montgomery

Author's Note: The 365 Project is an experimental _multi-fandom_ project to write and post at least one short every day for the next year, not including my semi-regular bi-weekly updates. For more details, see the relevent section in my profile. This is The 365 Project, 20 October.

In the immortal words of Samuel L. Clemens... "Persons attempting to find a motive in this narrative will be prosecuted; persons attempting to find a moral in it will be banished; persons attempting to find a plot in it will be shot. BY ORDER OF THE AUTHOR."

Disclaimer: "Danny Phantom" and all associated characters and situations are created by Butch Hartman and used for entertainment purposes without permission or intent to profit.

* * *

><p>-o0O0o-<p>

"Grave Hunting"

'Midnight in Montgomery'

By J.T. Magnus, 'Turbo'

-o0o-

"He said 'Friend, it's good to see you. It's nice to know you care.' Then the wind picked up and he was gone. Was he ever really there?" - Alan Jackson, "Midnight in Montgomery".

-o0O0o-

* * *

><p>Ghosts have a special connection to their graves. They're where the strongest physical trace of their presence on the mortal plane remains and often serve as a beacon for them even in the next world. It is for this reason that so many rituals, even unintentional ones, take place at a person's grave and why the sight of a person's ghost lingering where their body has been buried is so commonplace. Even those who aren't as bound to their physical remains have been known to return to them on occasion, usually that of their birth or death or some other date of significance to them.<p>

Significant dates...

Ember McLain snorted to herself. She was unliving proof that the gods of rock and roll had a sense of humor. Even before she'd ever became a ghost, she'd had a unique relationship with music and death because of when she'd been born. After all, she was born on the infamous 'Day The Music Died' and had even died on the same day as the King himself passed away.

As Ember reached her gravesite, she shook her head at the 'proper young lady's name' her parents had given her back in those days of below-the-knee skirts and people actually going to drive-ins for the movies; she'd never liked being called Amberlynn, she could only barely tolerate 'Amber'. They just sounded so... appropriate and decent, everything she thrived on not being. Looking at her tombstone, she frowned and picked up a small triangular object, black and swirled gold in color and shining with a gloss finish, that hadn't been there on top of it the last time she had come to her grave.

"Who left a guitar pick here?" Ember wondered out-loud.


	23. I Wanna Talk About Me

Author's Note: The 365 Project is an experimental _multi-fandom_ project to write and post at least one short every day for the next year, not including my semi-regular bi-weekly updates. For more details, see the relevent section in my profile. This is The 365 Project, 25 October.

In the immortal words of Samuel L. Clemens... "Persons attempting to find a motive in this narrative will be prosecuted; persons attempting to find a moral in it will be banished; persons attempting to find a plot in it will be shot. BY ORDER OF THE AUTHOR."

Disclaimer: "Danny Phantom" and all associated characters and situations are created by Butch Hartman and used for entertainment purposes without permission or intent to profit. The song "I Wanna Talk About Me" is owned and performed by Toby Keith.

Pairings: Ember/Skulker... sorta.

* * *

><p>-o0O0o-<p>

"I Wanna Talk About Me"

By J.T. Magnus, 'Turbo'

-o0O0o-

* * *

><p>Ember McLain's head hurt and she rubbed it with a low growl, narrowing her eyes at the cause of her pain with a look of death. It was still <em>talking<em>.

"And then, the gigantic ikkyak came lolloping down the mountain," Skulker continued his story uncaring of anyone else, "But I was ready, I had set a trap for the beast. I was waiting at the mountain's base with one of my biggest cannons and when it appeared, I fired above it and brought the entire mountainside crashing down on it in an avalanche! Ha-ha, it was glorious!"

"Will... you... SHUT UP!" Ember finally snarled at him.

"What did you just say to me?" Skulker snapped back sharply.

"I told you to shut up!" Ember repeated, "Day after day, all the time, all we talk about is you; we talk about your hunts about your trophies and your traps. We talk about your tools and how everyone else is fools. We talk about the one that gets away and how you'll get him someday..."

"The halfa-brat -" Skulker started, only to be interrupted by the ghost rocker.

"But every once in a while... I wanna talk about me, wanna talk about 'I', wanna talk about number one," Ember burst out, "Oh my, me, my; what I think, what I like, what I know, what I want, what I see... I like talking about you, you, you, you, usually... but occasionally, I wanna talk about me!"

It appeared that Skulker blinked, "But we do talk about -"

"You, you, you, you, you," Ember screamed to the heavens, "I wanna talk about me!"

"Okay," Skulker conceeded.

Ember deflated, "What?"

"Okay, we can talk about you," Skulker answered, "Tell me, when did you first notice how great I am?"

"Argh!" Ember roared in fury, shooting up into the air and pulling her guitar free, "You jerk!"

Like a Viking war-maiden's battle-axe, Ember swung her musical axe intending to cleave Skulker's head from his shoulders. She swung the guitar with all her might, knocking Skulker's helmet away and to the floor, then hovered there frowning as there was no sight of his head.

"Hey!" the sound came from the chest area of Skulker's armor, "What was that for? I agreed to talk about you _and_ me at least!"

With a growl, Ember raised her guitar over her head and brought it down to carve a gash down the front of Skulker's armor, dividing it in two.

Skulker stuck his head out of the jagged tear in his armor, "Have you gone crazy, woman?"

Ember's eyes went wide at the sight of the small blob-like figure that was inside her boyfriend's armor, then narrowed in suspicion, "Skulker?"

"Yes, it is I, Skulker, greatest hunter of the Ghost Zone," the blob shot back, "Now answer me, what is your problem?"

Ember began to breath heavily in barely constrained fury as she snarled at him, "You lied to me, you little worm!"

Then all hell broke loose.

* * *

><p>-o0o-<p>

The next day, seated beside a pond in the living world, Ember didn't even blink as the ghost-child flew down to hover above her.

"What are you doing here, Ember?" Danny Phantom demanded.

"Fishing," she answered, lifting her guitar so that he could see the bait she had tied to the head with a spare E-string.

The 'little worm' on the end of the line was indignant; "Release me! I demand you release me now! I am Skulker, greatest hunter of the Ghost Zone! You can't treat me like this!"

Danny blinked as Ember lowered Skulker back down into the water.

"I hate to break it to you," he finally remarked, "But I think your bait is scaring away all the fish."

"Eh," Ember shrugged, "If I don't catch anything today, tomorrow I'm taking it shark fishing."


	24. Car Trip

Author's Note: The 365 Project is an experimental _multi-fandom_ project to write and post at least one short every day for the next year, not including my semi-regular bi-weekly updates. For more details, see the relevent section in my profile. This is The 365 Project, 3 November. Sorry if my quality has dropped. This last week has been rather... stressful...

In the immortal words of Samuel L. Clemens... "Persons attempting to find a motive in this narrative will be prosecuted; persons attempting to find a moral in it will be banished; persons attempting to find a plot in it will be shot. BY ORDER OF THE AUTHOR."

Disclaimer: "Danny Phantom" and all associated characters and situations are created by Butch Hartman and used for entertainment purposes without permission or intent to profit.

* * *

><p>-o0O0o-<p>

"Car Trip"

By J.T. Magnus, 'Turbo'

-o0O0o-

* * *

><p>"Turn your voices down and the radio up, you're giving me a headache," he snapped sharply, cutting off the argument in its third repetition.<p>

The other passengers in the vehicle went silent and turned to look at him, stunned by the uncharacteristic outburst. He couldn't help it, they had been arguing ever since they had left and every time he thought it was coming to an end, they just ended up starting back over at the beginning. What was supposed to be a vacation, a time of family and togetherness was quickly becoming a pain in the neck and a shining example of why spending time as a family was a bad idea.

"I don't really _care_ at this point if there is or isn't a Santa or what he'd think about the Rockefeller Plaza tree," Danny continued ranting at his parents, "It doesn't matter; if he's not real, you won't get anything anyway and if he is real, just what makes you think you'd be on his nice list? So just stop arguing about it and turn the radio up so we can actually hear something worth listening to."

Jack Fenton blinked at the comment about not being on Santa's nice list if he was real and finally muttered, "That's a thought that's gonna fester."

Jazz looked at her younger brother from the other side of the rear seat, "You know they didn't pay attention to a word you said, right?"

Danny snorted and turned to look out the window, "So what else _isn't_ new?"


	25. Danny Phantom and The Ghoul School

Author's Note: The 365 Project is an experimental _multi-fandom_ project to write and post at least one short every day for the next year, not including my semi-regular bi-weekly updates. For more details, see the relevent section in my profile. This is The 365 Project, 21 November.

In the immortal words of Samuel L. Clemens... "Persons attempting to find a motive in this narrative will be prosecuted; persons attempting to find a moral in it will be banished; persons attempting to find a plot in it will be shot. BY ORDER OF THE AUTHOR."

Disclaimer: "Danny Phantom" and all associated characters and situations are created by Butch Hartman and used for entertainment purposes without permission or intent to profit. Scooby-Doo and all related characters are the property of Hanna-Barbera and used without permission or intent to profit.

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><p>-o0O0o-<p>

"Danny Phantom and the Ghoul School"  
>By J.T. Magnus, 'Turbo'<p>

-o0O0o-

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><p>Sometimes, a person has to make a decision based on facts at hand and their own best interest. Any fool can make the right choice, but making the best decision when all the choices are bad ones is an art form which only few ever master. When one needs a job and the only choices are going into the family business or taking a position - degree not required - at a school halfway across the country, it's not always hard for distance to trump family. Especially when the applicant's family is in the ghost hunting business and they themselves are a Halfa - half-ghost, half-mortal.<p>

Nineteen-year-old Daniel Fenton looked between the handwritten note he held and the sign in front of him, frowning at the extremely noticable difference between the two object. Over the phone, Danny was sure he had heard - and had written down - the name of 'The Grimwood Finishing School For Girls'. The sign itself, however, said otherwise, welcoming the Halfa to the 'Ms. Grimwood's Finishing School For Ghouls'. He really hoped the sign was just the doing of someone with a really off-kilter sense of humor, because he wasn't sure he wanted to know what it would mean otherwise.

It took him another ten minutes before he finally reached the only building which could be the school - the only building around at all - and slowly ascended the steps to the front door... and knocked. Slowly, the door opened and Danny found himself face-to-chest with the tallest, thinnest man he could remember seeing; dressed in slacks and a green t-shirt and with a head of hair that epitomised 'wild'.

"Like, heh-heh, you Daniel Fenton?"

"Um... Yeah?" Danny answered uncertainly.

"Super!" the man took a step back, "Come on in! I'm Shaggy Rogers, the, like, Gym Coach and Deputy Head - welcome to the Grimwood School."


	26. Ghoul School II - Meet The Students

Author's Note: The 365 Project is an experimental _multi-fandom_ project to write and post at least one short every day for the next year, not including my semi-regular bi-weekly updates. For more details, see the relevent section in my profile. This is The 365 Project, 17 December.

In the immortal words of Samuel L. Clemens... "Persons attempting to find a motive in this narrative will be prosecuted; persons attempting to find a moral in it will be banished; persons attempting to find a plot in it will be shot. BY ORDER OF THE AUTHOR."

Disclaimer: "Danny Phantom" and all associated characters and situations are created by Butch Hartman and used for entertainment purposes without permission or intent to profit. Scooby-Doo and all related characters are the property of Hanna-Barbera and used without permission or intent to profit. Expect nods to other live-action and animated sources as well...

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><p>-o0O0o-<p>

"Danny Phantom and the Ghoul School"  
>'Meet The Students'<br>By J.T. Magnus, 'Turbo'

-o0O0o-

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><p>Daniel Fenton dropped facefirst into his new bed with a groan. He had hoped that the 'School for Ghouls' on the sign was a misprint that they'd left up out of humor or even tagging from some local vandals, but he had found himself disappointed. The headmistress was a witch, the deputy head - and one of his fellow teachers - was a former detective and monster-hunter - not that anyone could tell it by looking at the guy, the faculty consisted of a squid that could somehow walk and breath on dry land, a hand without a body, a dragon and a talking dog that didn't seem to realise that he even <em>was<em> a dog...

Then there were the _students_...

Sassaba was a sasquatch, her father was Tumenah, better known to most as the legendary 'Bigfoot'. Considering that one of Danny's own teachers in his ghost powers had been a yeti ghost, and the yeti and sasquatch were related, he was actually more comfortable dealing with her than some of her classmates.

Marcia was a Martian, that one took a little getting used to. Danny still wasn't sure if she was a ghoul since she was an extraterrestrial, not an Earth monster, but that was just something for him to think about. Her father had sent her to the Grimwood School after the uncle she had been living with was arrested for violation of interstellar arms treaties and interstellar terrorism for planning to blow up Earth with an Illudium Q-36 Explosive Space Modulator, claiming in his defense that the 'Third Planet' was blocking his view of Venus.

Then there was Levy; dealing with her being a gillman - or would that be 'gillmaid' or 'gillgirl', Danny wasn't sure - was easy, it was the fact that she constantly forgot and slipped into her native Brazilian-Portugese when she was talking that was actually turning out to be her biggest problem.

Zuki was an exchange student from Japan, fortunately for everyone she seemed to take more after her brothers G.J. and Minilla then their father when it came to humans. It was even more fortunate that as long as she ate meat and such and didn't absorb radiation she wouldn't start growing to the size of her infamous city-destroying father. Her worst habit was listening to music by The Blue Oyster Cult for hours on end.

Finally, the oldest girl-ghoul at the school was Tanis, a mummy who had been attending the Grimwood School since she was younger. How a mummy, a dead person whose body was reanimated by ancient Egyptian magic, could age, Danny wasn't sure he wanted to know. He knew that some people would have the same reaction to the idea of someone being able to be a half-ghost. It just didn't fit with conventional knowledge. And these were the girls he would be teaching? Danny groaned into his pillow, maybe being dissected molecule by molecule wouldn't have been so bad after all...

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><p>-o0O0o-<p>

Author's Note: And now, the breakdown

Marcia The Martian is actually a character from Warner Bros. 'Tiny Toon Adventures', where her uncle is, of course, Marvin The Martian.

Levy is the daughter of 'The Creature from The Black Lagoon' and is named after a mistranslation of Revy, one of the characters from the anime/manga "Black Lagoon", just another example of my twisted humor sometimes.

Zuki is the daughter of Godzilla. I'm well aware that 'Godzuki' from the 70's-80's cartoon and Minilla are technically supposed to be the same character, but I found it fitting to use the name. Her favorite Blue Oyster Cult song is, obviously, "Godzilla".


	27. What Are You Doing New Year's Eve

Author's Note: The 365 Project is an experimental _multi-fandom_ project to write and post at least one short every day for the next year, not including my semi-regular bi-weekly updates. For more details, see the relevent section in my profile. This is The 365 Project, 26 December.

In the immortal words of Samuel L. Clemens... "Persons attempting to find a motive in this narrative will be prosecuted; persons attempting to find a moral in it will be banished; persons attempting to find a plot in it will be shot. BY ORDER OF THE AUTHOR."

Disclaimer: "Danny Phantom" and all associated characters and situations are created by Butch Hartman and used for entertainment purposes without permission or intent to profit.

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><p>-o0O0o-<p>

"What Are You Doing New Year's Eve"  
>By J.T. Magnus, 'Turbo'<p>

-o0O0o-

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><p>Ember McLain strummed her guitar gently - just because she normally rocked out didn't mean she couldn't play anything easier, it was all a matter of her mood and right now she was in a thoughtful one. It wasn't a normal mood for her considering that she preferred to just go wild and go with the flow, but it came on her sometimes. The problem was that this time the thoughtful mood had decided to bring with it thoughts of a certain half-human dipstick that were refusing to get out of her head, and part of her wanted to blame the fact that even death wasn't stopping Dick Clark from throwing his 'Rockin' New Year's Eve' and she had been asked to perform this time around. The problem was that she tried whenever she could to avoid thinking about New Year's Eve and the traditions that went with it, something that wasn't always easy considering she spent most of her afterlifetime around Kitty and Johnny and they revelled in that annoying tradition every year. It was almost pathetic - they could be on the outs December thirtieth, but they always got back together in time to kiss at midnight on the thirty-first. Every year it just seemed to turn her stomach worse than it had the year before. This year, though, her stomach was twisting for an even more disturbing reason than watching as two of her best friends attempted a mutual tonsilectomy using only their tongues... It was bothering her because more than once she'd caught herself wondering what it would be like to get the dipstick in that position herself.<p>

With a sigh, Ember softly sang along to the melody she was playing, "Wonder whose arms will hold you good and tight when it's exactly twelve o'clock that night, welcoming in the New Year's, New Year's Eve..."


End file.
